One Second

It has taken me nearly five years to come to terms with letting go of baby clothes. I have put aside some of the things that I really love and the others I am reluctantly preparing for a consignment sale. It's a lot of work to prep clothes for one of those sales. And it takes a lot of hangers. In addition to hangers, you need safety pins to attach the tags with and this is what led me to wal-mart at 6pm on a Friday night. Well, that and the fact that Tony was still working, supper was done and I needed to fill a few more hours before bed.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, I do not like wal-mart. It's the last place on earth I want to shop, but occasionally you have those few things that you need and wal-mart is the best chance of finding all three. So there we were.

Marlee was in my arms, I was holding Kaylen's hand and Jacob was walking beside us as we headed into the store. Those treacherous moments are the worst part of shopping with the exception of buckling and unbuckling people in car seats.

Far down the lane in the first handicap space a lady whipped her car into the spot, coming from the wrong direction.

Time slowed the few seconds we were behind her car about a minute later. I was looking up into her car and I see a lady on her phone, her car backing up. She never looked. I'm pulling Kaylen, she dropped her purse and stopped, I lose my grasp. My heart started and stopped a thousand times, I moved so achingly slow.  It felt like slow motion as I frantically scrambled to regain my hold, the car still backing. I wasn't even sure I was me, the world went silent. In that eternal second I pulled Jacob and Kaylen away in the nick of time. She still never looked.

A man and his family saw it happen and he was incredulous as this lady sat in her car still on the phone oblivious to the fact that she was a breath away from changing her life and mine forever. Finally she opened her door and the gentleman said, "Man! You almost ran over the kids! You never looked!"

Her half-hearted apology told me that she didn't grasp the gravity of her narrow escape.

I continued on into the store and left the man to tell her how very close she came to hitting me and my children. I could hear his stern lecture as I put one foot in front of the other, stepping. Then I started shaking.

A breath, a distraction, a ring of the phone, a new radio station and a life can forever be altered. And the shock waves to those left behind will ripple until eternity.

Tucking my babies into bed tonight, I looked at those beautiful faces and thanked God for his protection over them and for his protection over that lady as well. As hard as it would be to lose one of mine, even worse would be to be the one who did it.

Tonight I resolve, when I'm in the car a phone call can wait, so can a text. My eyes and my ears need to be fully focused on my job, to safely carry my passengers and to navigate around everyone else.

All it takes is that one time that you never look.